My lungs are failing me. Seriously, if I don't wake up,

eh. I have nothing to say also.

I'm feeling tightness in chest for the whole day. I hope it's muscle strain from ydae and that nothing bad will happen.

what the fuck man. i appear offline for 30mins and everyone started logging in. i appear online and they are off one by one. nabeh.

It's damn weird. I've not been in school these days. And I've not seen people coming online at all. Not the judokas. Nor the classmates.

What's happening man?

dental clinic sign 

Another thought. Is void bad? Why do people keeping wanting to do things. Do they fear not doing anything?

Is wanting bad? Is wanting wrong? Why do you dislike it? Do you prefer to laze around? Who's right and wrong? I'll be back in a while with the answer I hope.

As Maslow has stated, we need these in this order.
Physiological needs
Safety needs
Love/Belonging needs
Esteem needs
Being needs
Self-actualization
Self-transcendence

Rephrasing them, I can classify them in this order:
The need to eat food.
The need to feel protected. Have your own house etc.
The need to have friends, family who care.
The need for recognition, in many forms, be it wearing branded stuff, be it being able to come in first in sports or studies, be it a weird attention catching haircut etc.
The need to be oneself so that they can use all of their abilities. At peace basically.
The need to help others so as to feel fulfillment.

So we all need something. It becomes normal to need, in this case, eh?

I'm getting upset man.

Are all gamers, rather, most, 98%, made up of uncult people? Yes it's true. How many times have I(or you if you game as much as I do) seen people who simply kills/irritates the other player for fun and laughs about it? Many. In fact it's so commonplace. One can easily relate it to gangfight.

//45mins of digression. I was looking at other sites.
4.12PM

..relate that to gangfight, using brawn(or magic) and killing each other. Yelling, "n00b, u g0tz pawns l0l0l." Fucking lame. So why is it that they don't think likewise?

And for quite a while I thought it was so. At least, a few months in secondary 2. In crude Chinese they call it ' gou gai bu liao chi da bian ', literally means that a dog cannot stop eating shit. And hence he went back to gaming.

//digression again. I was looking at crow culling.
//4.20pm

Being trapped in the cyberworld really warps your mindset. Your view is so limited. And the focus is totally off. This can be proven by the fact that I actually thought the most people are using firefox. Not true. It's just that people who play games like I do, surf net like I do, think like me, have the same habits as me. Basically, you can trick yourself into believing by reaffirming yours make-beliefs. By verifying with your friends. (not quite making sense here) They all would probably do the same and think the same as you. Why else are you people hanging out?

I feel a lot better suddenly. (Except for the strange constriction in my chest. The cough seems to have been suppressed though.) A lot better not just physically, but psychologically(?). I feel. Relieved somewhat. Cant explain this.

I'm a freaking moron. Was raining. I stuck my hand out of the window in the rain on purpose and waited for lightning. I tried to ground myself but heck, lightning did come within 20 seconds. I jumped back. Haha.

Second thought. How many people are there in the world who are looking at the same page as I am at now?

And also, I have been looking at people expressing their views, and somehow I'm at ease after looking, reading at them all. One example would be Mr Wang.

It's normal to see people wanting this and that. There's nothing wrong with them. It's normal also not to want to be like them. There's nothing wrong with you either. Do the right thing. And just be yourself.

If they have to study, let them be. If you don't want to, then make sure you don't regret and don't. There is no need to try to be normal because no one's exactly normal. There isn't a benchmark for normal either. The normal freestyle timing for olympians is around 22 seconds. The normal timing of a person swimming leisurely is anything from 45 seconds to 2 minutes.

No doubt you will draw attention around the wrong people for your deeds, you still can't pretend to be someone else. Just be yourself. It's hard not to be affected by others. Or perhaps it makes sense only to stick to convention? You are a weird ass. No you aren't. You are expendable. There are millions who are like you out there. Just as you thought your sec sch classmate was weird case, you found another one in cj and you don't even know him. And there you have it, similar weird cases with people as old as us, in this small island. Millions of other towns out that buddy.

So we don't have to stick to convention nor do we have to try to be different. Just be yourself and stay happy or stay okay at least. But the sad thing is not everyone thinks like this. And you are still affected by others, their views.

(I'm feeling down as I think more and more about this. I'm off.)



Of course, it's easy to say this now that I'm alone at home blogging in front of the computer.

karebu, your career personality type is INFP

That means that based on the standard measure of personality traits, you are highly organized and have strong project management skills. You prefer to work independently and then pass your ideas or tasks on to others. When others lose sight of the big picture, you help them to stay focused to see what's important and weed out unnecessary details. This skill set will help you succeed in nearly any workplace.

The reason employers and recruiters might be on the lookout for you is that only about 3-4% of the U.S. population shares the unique characteristics of your personality type. Research shows that businesses succeed when employers create a good balance of personality types in the office. And since only 3-4% of the U.S. population shares your type, that means employers are looking for you.

But, to truly show employers what you have to offer, you need to understand a little more about traits that make up your type.

Your personalized Career Personality Report has been generated with the profiling information that many job seekers, career counselors, and recruiters have used for years to help people in your very situation. And it's ready right now!

MBTI� and the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator� are registered trademarks and Myers-Briggs� is a trademark of Consulting Psychologists Press, Inc., the publisher of the MBTI instrument. Tickle is not affiliated with and is not a licensee of Consulting Psychologists Press, Inc.


----------------------

duh, i knew that answer years ago.

"Rich bastards. I don't get it. Why do girls like them so much?"
"Heh, don't ask me. It's just a coincidence all my boyfriends turned out to be rich bastards."
"Actually, we only like the rich part. Not the bastard part."
"Oh, come on. I know guys who never made it through school, live off their rich parents' money, bum at home without work or education, and still gets more action than most guys around here. Girls love rich bastards."
"Yeah, but if their parents stop giving them money, they're just gonna be bastards. Full stop."


-from kenny.

and if i dont recover in another 1/1/2 days, its dengue 

this sugarfree lemon+herbs strepsils taste like.. some.. aromatheraphy oil? 

I like stepping on bugs. They go squish squish squish. And I smile. :)  

we all need some blood to feel alive. come. 

Life is so damn exciting man.

I need to dive.

I need to do crazy things.

I need to do one more crazy thing this year,

wohoho. new crest man. 

"I was going to be a doctor but my mom encouraged me to pursue prostitution"

Can put legs behind his head, but it costs extra and looks ridiculous.

Favorite dinosaur: Penisaurus.

damn. my knees are still bad. and i'm not kicking enough. shoulders too weak. back weak.

from a to j, the buttocks are close to water. not for me.

this is a screenshot of a lame singaporean. my chatroom reads Buy/Trade .dokebi card leave name/offer. and he goes. "what do u want?" "dokebi card" "sori" "i sold it to sum one else oledi". what kind of language man. and dumbass. what else do i want? 

taekwondo class. haha 

fuck man! arghhh. i woke up and my mum gave me some weird drink to drink.

and it has antelope horn powder dissolved in it! argh. poor animals! damn. i would need to go fast for a thousand days!

yes when ben and i were walking around sch he heard someone play some ff7 song on piano. so he tried to talk to him. and that guy had a weird expression which reminded me of some other person i knew. sheesh. cant really describe that. a look of irritance yet gay. shakes head and frown and jaws widen and looks piss but still gay.

damn. people who truly truly love their art have something wrong man.




and oh. zzz. the cough syrup is drowsy.

but i don't think nows the time to ban the smokers with the aedes mosq around. let them smoke and kill the mos. 

uh huh. sounds fair. banning smoking and stuff all over. 

wow. old casette player. sometimes i just wonder why old appliances never spoil. like old tvs and all. while the new ones blow out in a few years. 

[01:56:21 PM] ��sT�n�&L�v�: ||~an nyung Sian, an nyung..~||: hey...do
you have Xero server?
[01:56:32 PM] He: huh?
[01:56:40 PM] ��sT�n�&L�v�: ||~an nyung Sian, an nyung..~||: um the
Xero
[01:56:44 PM] He: their sclient or data
[01:56:48 PM] He: or are you asking me if i server files
[01:56:57 PM] ��sT�n�&L�v�: ||~an nyung Sian, an nyung..~||: um the
web sites
[01:57:07 PM] He: www.google.com
[01:57:24 PM] ��sT�n�&L�v�: ||~an nyung Sian, an nyung..~||: sorry
for asking that question again because my laptop
corrupted so i havent been online for 3 months
[01:57:39 PM] He: go there
[01:57:42 PM] He: and type xero server
[01:57:43 PM] ��sT�n�&L�v�: ||~an nyung Sian, an nyung..~||: ok thx

--------------------------------------------------
stupid idiot. laptop corrupted and not being online for 3 months doesn't mean you don't know what the fuck is a search engine. thanking me for giving him a link to google. dumb ass. argh.

and a good majority of which perished in the sea.

Sigh. Not possible to watch it anymore. Sian.

Anyway, I'm seriously attracting lots of lians.

walking down staircase this morning. 2 STARED at me.
bus stop. another one.
school. ? this i don't know?
lot 1 shoppin mall. a few.
waiting for mrt. 1
crossing road walking from home. 2.

Watched the myth. Sigh. I guess they wanted to end the show early man. And of course to make it real. He COULD have said he's meng yi! Dumbass! Bring your sword and swing dude! Oh well. You can't possibly bring an immortal into our world and stuff.

Oh. And while I was on the train home, I saw some NSmen on the train. Someone about 10cm shorter than me asking the other, "Eh, guess how heavy I am?" Lots of rubbish. Then he's 80. I thought to myself, uh huh. And he added, "I can't do one pull up." .. Useless man. You just have to said that on a crowded train wearing your uniform. And 80kg is not impossible. I do 10. I'm heavier.

EH FUCKER! GET OUT OF MY HOUSE MAN! ARGHHH. I WANNA WATCH MY SHOW AND YOU ARE TALKING CRAP WITH MY MUM. FUCK FUCK FUCK. ZZZZ.

:D 

my lady!!  

erh. your shell price police huh. is your cam working or what? i see a wire though. 

and even more. 

and more 

ppl stepped on cement 

and thats what im reading 

dorks lining by the wall to read papers. haha. 

sunflower left in bottle for more than 3 weeks. water turned yellow. i wonder. 

This is the stupidest shit man. Stupidest ever.
http://www.pussysnorkel.com/facts.htm
By using that arent you implying that your girls pussy is smelly?

Guy to girl:
"Imma going down on you baby!"
Girl squeals
Guy manages a half smile and says:
"Hold on while I get something."
Guy comes back looking like a dork or a martian and possibly both.
"Lets continue!"
---------------------------------------------------------

Dont get me wrong, I was looking for snorkeling. The proper one in sea. On google yeah.

http://www.google.com/search?sourceid=mozclient&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&q=snorkel

---------------------------------------------------------

-3 mins later-

OMFG. There's another stupider than stupidest thing.
http://www.totallyabsurd.com/toiletsnorkel.htm
Breathing in sewage gas. Fuckshit!

Fireman to medic:
"This man was found sucking from the toilet bowl. Give him a resuscitation!"

My lungs are failing me.. Felt damn terrible after a jog.
And the fever is recurring too.

Do you know why there is such a thing called the stocking?

There was no shaving nor waxing in the past. Prostitutes in the past wore stockings - men simply don't want to rub legs with something pricky or hairy. But wouldn't they notice hair? Nope. It's done in the dark or dim lights. Doh.

Yeah, my previous post was about being ashamed of those stuff. And I stumbled on this blog. The epitome of what I was saying. Just look at the profile / info at the side.

http://simpletimberlake.blogspot.com/

Hmm. Just watched "te xie" on channel 8. Quite touching. The supervisor learning sign language to communicate with his workers and going out with them to eat. And also the boss who learnt thai and buy stuff and hang out at his workers' hostel. Must admit that the hostel was far from what you can imagine. Very very run down and cramp. But still. It's rather heartwarming.

Sometimes I'm so ashamed of my equips. My phone. My expensive stuff basically. But then again. I'm feel inadequate when I see people wearing expensive stuff. Weird huh. Maybe we should all be ashamed of those things. Bah. This is all confusing. If I keep thinking along this line I will give up studying totally.

Diligence. Humble oneselves. Hmm.

No. You need confidence.

Hmm. I was thinking of changing my dressing style. Tried searching the net. Nope. None for guys(teens). Just men and girls and woman.

You would think it's easy to dress up. Nope not really. Not for stoutly guys. Yeah. If I were much smaller in build yes. Just throw in the standard apparel, yes yes, your tees and your jeans/bermudas and top that up with those bata-ish converse/nike shoes. Can you visualize a big person wearing those? Nope. Bad. Formal is not the answer man. It gets boring and no one knows when you are unformal or for that matter, really formal.

Yeah. Sian. I'm hoping NS will trim me down. Since they gave me M size uniform and said I won't grow any bigger. Haha.


Anyway, I'm thinking about another thing.
Why are men so afraid of each other? There's this no physical contact thing. Women on the other hand feel free to hug or kiss hello, paint each other's nail and males just can't do it. The only time men touch is when their fists connect to each other's faces or somewhere else.
Haha.

Ah damn. Lost my train of thought again.

So here I am
with open arms

But still there's a problem leaves you gasping for air
you look for some meaning, blank smiles are all that's there

I cannot speak
I've lost my voice

Girl I hope you see
what losing you would do to me

Day in, day out like a puppet on a string
wandering in the void between zero and infinity

This time I'm mistaken
for handing you a heart worth breakin

Let her cry
if the tears fall down like rain

The love that I feel is so far away
I'm a bad dream that I just can't take

Got to cut away, clear away, snip away and sever this
umbilical residue, keeping me from killing you

The world has grown cold
now that you've gone away

I am just a worthless liar, I am just an imbecile
I will only complicate you, trust in me and fall as well

Here I am
will you send me an angel?

In Japan, very little fat is eaten and the heart attack rate is lower than in the USA.

In France, alot of fat is eaten and the heart attack rate is lower than in the USA.

In India, very little red wine is drunk and the heart attack rate is lower than in the USA.

In Spain, alot of red wine is drunk and the heart attack rate is lower than in the USA.

In Brazil, people have more sex than in Algeria.

And the heart attack rate in both countries is lower than in the USA.

In order words:
Drink.
Eat.
Have as much sex as you like.

What can kill you is speaking English.

This night walk the dead.
In a solitary style and crash the cemetery gates.
In the dress your husband hates.
Way down.
Mark the grave.
Where the searchlights find us drinking by the mausoleum door.
And they found you on the bathroom floor.
I miss you so far. And the collision of your kiss that made it so hard.
Back home.
Off the run.
Singing songs that make you slit your wrists.
It isn't that much fun.
Staring down a loaded gun.
So I won't stop dying.
Won't stop lying.
If you want I'll keep on crying.
Did you get what you deserve?
Is this what you alway's want me for?
I miss you.


Wait until it fades to black
Ride into the sunset
Would I lie to you?
Well, I've got something to say
Grab your six-gun from your back
Throttle the ignition
Would I die for you?
Well here's your answer in spades
Shotgun sinners
Wild eyed jokers
Got you in my sights
Gun it while I'm holding on
After all is said and done
Climb out from the pine box
Well I'm asking you
'Cause she's got nothing to say
The angels just cut out her tongue
Call her black Mariah
Would I lie to you?
That girl's not right in the brain
Mass convulsions
Strike the choir
By the grace of God
Gun it while I'm holding on
But don't stop if I fall
And don't look back
Oh baby don't stop
Bury me and fade to black
She won't stop me put it down
So get your gun and meet me by the door
She won't stop me put it down
So baby...
Don't stop if I fall
And don't look back
Oh baby don't stop
Bury me and fade to black

This babe protects from mosquito. 2,3,5,6-tetrafluorobenzyl (1R)-trans-3-(2,2-dichlorovinyl)-2,2-dimethylcyclopropanecarboxylate 

everythings working fine. (no the mouse isn't small. my hand is big.) 

another two pieces together 

snap the first piece. still working. 

my troops. i sprayed them with disinfectant. (scented.) haha.