karebu

yeh. what a lively baby.

babies arent supposed to be reborned.. anyway their stats are capped at 80..

baby.. really baby sized.. job called baby..

adoption . so this is how it goes

ahhh. fancy a boxer? it reads I'm feeling lucky all over. lol.

scary smiths. weapon meltdown and cart termination. and btw, that emoticon came up on its own.

okay, been tweaking my server for the past few days. hm. so this is how weapon repair works.

wow. i was out in town. walking around. then i got stopped by a lady from imodels international. "hello i am from imodels international and we are looking for good looking people for .. .blahblah.." "can you write your contact number down.. blah blah" Iwas in a hurry. didn't quite listen to what she was saying. so i left my contact behind. hmm. first on the list though. (the notebook was blank.) cross fingers. hmm. now i wonder. set me thinking. hmm. i always think i look like shit. no self confidence. but then again. must not got too haolian or what. God is known for being cruel. geez. please. thanks. I fear You, and i am extremely thankful for what I have.

It's so hard to manage with 2 girlfriends. I think I'll cut down time spent with gf1 and spend more time with gf2. gf1 saps too much power; though she's interactive and all, I still think it's not good to spend so much time with her. I hate to do this, but I'm think I'm going to be a two-timer; I'll try to spend more time with gf2. She's so wet. =D But she's always cold. =\ What to do. But hey, I get more exercise with her anyways. ..which reminds me.. I have to get new goggles.. The old one is +3.00 on each side.. I need to customize a new one. +4.75 on left, +5.00 on right. Nod.

you are gonna find someone new
i really hope you do
coz i love you

can you keep your oath. can you. can you. or can you not. are you even willing.

choices.
i can be full of hate.
i can smile.
i can be happy.

and i think im going to regret.. is it a trap or what?

I don't know your face no more
Or feel your touch that I adore
I don't know your face no more
It's just a place I'm looking for
We might as well be strangers in another town
We might as well be living in a different world
We might as well
We might as well
We might as well

I don't know your thoughts these days
We're strangers in an empty space
I don't understand your heart
It's easier to be apart

We might as well be strangers in another town
We might as well be living in a another time
We might as well
We might as well
We might as well be strangers
Be strangers
For all I know of you now
For all I know of you now
For all I know of you now
For all I know

so is it goodbye?
is it time to set u free?
is it time to let it fly?
is it time to let it bleed

we used to take turns
to cover up the pain
deep below it burns
and the feelin' still remains

you're gonna find someone new
I really hope u do
cause I love u
and the sun will come on thru, it's gonna shine for you
cause I adore you

yes we gave it a try
but maybe for too long
out of every sorrow
another day will dawn

you're gonna find someone new
I really hope u do
cause I love u
and the sun will come on thru, it's gonna shine for you
cause I adore you

and the road travels on
but I'm still near you
in my life, like a song
I will still hear you
still

sun will shine for you
cause I adore you...

Patience.

look at marks ass.

gah! he didnt even notice it until i told him about it.

ano umi dokomade mo aokatta tooku made. ano michi dokomade mo tsuzuiteta massugu ni. ichiban hayaku sunao ni waratta mono gachi. ichiban suki na ano hito waratteru. dareyori mo tooku ni itte mo koko kara mata waratte kureru. hitomi wo tojireba futto natsu no hi no nioi. ano kawa asonderu futari kiri doro darake. ano kumo otteiru todoitara shiawase to. ichiban hayaku kono saka nobotta mono gachi. ichiban suki na ano basho mezashite. takusan no omoide ga aru hoka ni wa nani mo iranai gurai. hitomi wo tojireba sugu ano umi no nioi. mata natsu ga kuru giniro ni hikaru. minamo ni utsusu futaribun no kage.

I had wings.
They were pure white wings, and I was flying.
No, it was a sad dream,
the saddest dream in the world.
But this is the end of my dream.

I'll be all alone.
I'll really be alone.
I can't do my best anymore if I'm alone.
What should I do?
Hang in there.
Hang in there even if you are alone.
I'll try my best.
I'm strong.
I'm all alone now,
really all alone.
It hurts.
It hurts.
I was all alone until now.
It'l be the same starting tomorrow.
In the end, even if I try my best, I just cause other people trouble, and nothing good ever happens.
I should have just kept on giving up like before,
without loving anyone.
I'll go to sleep.
I don't care if I never wake up.
I've finally realized.
I was happy just being by your side and seeing your smile.
Why is it?

shiroku togireta yume no kirehashi no tsukamete shounen wa hashiru. te wo hanashitara doko made mo tooku kaze no ne ni kieteyuku. itsuka mieta yasashisa wa mou nai. hitori fumidasu ashi dake miteru. asa ni wa kieta no uta goe wo itsumade mo kiiteta. bokura ga nokoshita ano ashiato wo itsumade mo otteta.

kieru hikouki gumo bokutachi wa miokutta. mabushikute nigeta kuyashikute yubi wo hanasu. todoka nai basho ga mada tooku ni aru, negai dake himete mitsu meteru. kodomotachi wa natasu no senro aruku, ryote ni wa tobitatsu kibou wo.
kieru hikouki gumo oikakete oikakete, kono oka wo koeta ano hi kara kawarazu itsumade mo, massugu ni bokutachi wa aru you ni, watatsumi no you na tsuyosa wo mamoreru yo kitto. ja.

Not good. I woke up with my fingers on my left hand numb still. It was numb before I slept. I think it's due to the judo training on Saturday. Didn't fall properly. Also, I fell on my head during randori. Now the area (on my head) behind my right ear is swollen. Bad.

Because I am nothing but illusions. Just illusions. I have nothing. I am nothing.

I hate myself.

I want to get out, but I can't. It isn't like you can choose. It's karma I suppose. Maybe I am supposed to learn to deal with this. Maybe. But I don't. I escape. And I've punished myself already. You know it.

What can I trade to atone for all these?

This isn't a choice that I can make. Maybe it is. But. It frightens me to reveal my true self.

True enough, there will always be people worse of and all. But hey, the glass is half empty. I am lost.

I hate myself.

You Are 30% Normal

(Occasionally Normal)

You sure do march to your own beat...

But you're so weird, people wonder if it's a beat at all

You think on a totally different wavelength

And it's often a chore to get people to understand you

How Normal Are You?

this isn't the first time. sometimes i just stay put, think of nothing, and my tears come out on their own. i wonder why.